Top 7 Fatherhood Myths - Are They True?
Jan 09, 2020As a father, you’ll go into every day making assumptions about what you’re about to do and how you’re supposed to do it. However, beneath your assumptions are “ideas” that may have been implanted in your behavior without you knowing it.
We’re talking about the myths of fatherhood. While some can be productive, others can be quite self-limiting. Worse yet, some of these myths can lead to toxic ideals that can hurt you as a father.
In this article, we at Dad University will debunk seven of the most common fatherhood myths. By the end of this, you’ll not only find out that these myths don’t hold water but by seeing through these fatherhood myths, you’ll know what thought patterns to watch out for and self-correct on your way to being the best dad you can be.
Let’s dive in!
Fatherhood Myth #1: “If I Make a Mistake, I’m Going To Mess Up My Child.”
One of the most commonly believed myths about being a dad is that your mistakes will mess up your kids in the future. While it’s true that you should aspire to be the best father you can be, expecting yourself to do the right thing all the time can become a psychological burden.
By holding yourself to an unrealistic standard, you’re paving the road toward self-hate and frustration. Instead of holding yourself to a standard of perfection, the best thing you can do is to know that you will make mistakes and that a good number of them won’t actually mess up your child.
In short, know that your child will turn out just fine regardless of whether you’re the perfect dad or not.
Fatherhood Myth #2: “A Father’s Primary Role Is To Make Money for the Family.”
If you’ve always thought that dads are the sole breadwinners of the family, you’re not alone. In fact, many of us fathers went into our paternal roles with this myth in mind — and, yes, it IS a myth!
As fathers, we can either be the ones making money, raising a child with mom, or, in most cases, both. For this reason, we break ourselves free from the idea that our roles are limited to just bringing in the bacon.
In some families, it’s mom who brings in an income. In others, mom and dad make money for the family.
It just all depends on the circumstances.
Hence, don’t beat yourself up if you find yourself being the primary caregiver for your child and not the one making money. And this brings us to the next myth we’re debunking.
Fatherhood Myth #3: “Fathers Aren’t as Good at Taking Care of Babies.”
If this were true, then there’s no reason for Dad University to exist.
Like making money and performing tasks around the house, we dads can be just as good at taking care of the children. Because of our paternal instincts, life experiences, and natural tendency to be physical, we dads are just as capable of showing love and affection to our children.
Fatherhood Myth #4: “Fathers Should Be Able To Do It All.”
Although we can be good breadwinners and caregivers at the same time, that doesn’t mean we’re always able to do everything. We’re likely to have limited skills and knowledge, so falling victim to this myth may lead us to question our worth as fathers.
As dads, we can’t hold ourselves to this standard any longer. Instead, we should strive toward progress instead of being a jack of all trades all the time.
Besides, if we were able to do everything, there would be no need to strive to be better dads. And at the end of the day, being a better dad (instead of a perfect one) is a big part of our journey.
Fatherhood Myth #5: “Dads Don’t Need To Spend as Much Time With Their Children.”
No matter what your neighbors tell you, you’re just as important as mom. With this in mind, there’s no reason why you should be spending less time with your kids. While certain responsibilities like work can limit the amount of time you can spend on your kids, this doesn’t mean you’re incapable of being with them.
As a father, you are also someone your child wants to be with. This is why you need to prioritize spending quality time with your kids even if you’ve got a busy schedule.
Fatherhood Myth #6: “Men Don’t Suffer Postpartum Depression.”
We may not experience it to the same degree that moms do. Nevertheless, postpartum depression is a real thing even for dads. For this reason, ignore anyone or any source that tells you otherwise.
Postpartum depression can manifest in us dads in several ways — its symptoms can be anything from low moods to trouble sleeping. If you’ve got postpartum depression, you might even experience irritability and changes in your eating patterns.
Whatever the symptoms are, you need to find the support you need if you’re dealing with postpartum depression. You deserve to.
Fatherhood Myth #7: “Fathers Are Less Nurturing Than Mothers.”
There’s a prevailing misconception going around that dads can’t be as nurturing as mothers. This is simply not true.
Contrary to popular belief, we dads possess an innate capacity for warmth, care, and emotional support. Although there may be some differences in how we express our love and care, our capability to be nurturing parents shows in every interaction we have with our kids.
Fact: Fatherhood Is All About Progress
Beneath the myths we’ve debunked is an unrealistic expectation all fathers have been told — this is the myth of perfection. By freeing yourself from this myth, you’ll set yourself up for success and be the best dad you can be, nurturing your kids in your unique way.
Fatherhood is all about the journey. And if you need someone to be with you in your pursuit of being a better dad, we at Dad University are here for you.
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